


How to Mend a Broken Heart ( You Can't Fix This )

by biifurcatedCoder



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Angst, F/M, Loss, M/M, Time Skips, im so sorry if the order of this makes no sense, nonsensical order of storytelling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-15
Updated: 2020-05-15
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:02:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,350
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24201763
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/biifurcatedCoder/pseuds/biifurcatedCoder
Summary: Dual/Rosa pale fic that mostly focuses on how they met, and what led up to Signless's death, with a bit of him trying to comfort her in the wake of it all.(Told all sorts of out of order, for which I do sincerely apologize)
Relationships: Orphaner Dualscar/Neophyte Redglare, The Dolorosa/Orphaner Dualscar, The Psiioniic | The Helmsman/The Signless | The Sufferer
Comments: 3
Kudos: 4
Collections: Ancestor Exchange 2020





	How to Mend a Broken Heart ( You Can't Fix This )

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Probably_Not_Batman](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Probably_Not_Batman/gifts).



Blood.

Every time you close your eyes, you see it again, smell it, it’s been hours, days, weeks even, perhaps. Mateus had helped retrieve his body, it had been up on display, to make a point, serve as an example. You felt nauseous thinking about it. After your son had been executed, publicly, you were taken in. You know Tho and Nideki had gotten away, you saw them dip into the crowd when you urged them to flee, don’t linger, you will take care of the rest. The executioner gave you a heartbroken look as he fired, if only because he seemed to care for Nideki, the olive whom had joined you three to try to help out. A jade, an olive, a goldblood, and Him… your boy…. Of brilliant off-spectrum red, so bright and warm it rivaled fuchsia in saturated beauty and vibrance… He was dead, because of it, and because he would not lay down in silence. You blame yourself, in heavy part, because you raised him to know he was worth more than he’d ever be treated. Know he should not tolerate being told red, any warm hue even, were less valuable than the cold hues and the seadwellers. 

Mateus…. A seadweller, the Empress’s orphaner, a terrible man with an atrocious job, but you know why he had to do it… The Empress’s lusus was a world destroyer lurking deep in the sea, and Mat’s job was to feed it, keep it quiet and keep it calm. It drove him nuts, the constant eldritch whispers of it in his pan as he hunted. For a seadweller, he had a powerful conscience, and tried his hardest to only kill wild lusii who had no charge… He was not a man of grubcare, most trolls weren’t, but he did seem to genuinely hate orphaning young trolls if he didn’t have to.. His neck was on the chopping block if he didn’t do his job, though, in addition to the very real threat of the beast of the deep destroying this planet and killing everything on it. The weight of the world, on the shoulders of a man who hated to see people hurting. He had that in common with your son, in a sense.. 

You’d met him by chance, fearing for your life, the lives of the other three with you, wanted trolls with a death warrant on your son, and he, the royal Orphaner, finds you. He isn’t alone, but he seemed to catch your trail and tell the others with him to spread out, search the area, and he will look this way, and to regroup when he says so. He sends them away from your hiding spot, the cavern you are all tucked into, and he approaches…. You have to convince the others with you not to try to attack him, to keep hidden, in case he fights do not reveal your locations or he WILL kill all four of you where you sit. His eyes meet yours, and you taste death on your tongue, lips curling to bare your fangs at him. He doesn’t shoot. The violet doesn’t even approach closer, voice dropping low. “Virgin mother… ye wouldn’t stray far from ye charges… if they be there with ye, keep hidden, tuck low and do not come out til we are far from here, then I recommend moving along… I can smell ye four in my gills, taste ye scent in the air, if my troop were not land walkers as well they’d certainly have found ye as soon as I…. hide, then run, I will keep ye from them and keep them moving along…. We be not out here searching for ye, but ye know the price on your heads if you were to be found…”

Peace. A trick? You don’t trust him, fully anticipating he will wait til you all are moving from your cave hiding spot to kill or capture you all, but he gives you a look, then re-covers the opening with the brush he’d nudged aside, and steps away, never drawing his weapons toward you. He leaves, leads the other troop out away with him, hunting lusii, finding a large beast and having the others with him go after it as he hunts another. 

The first time you had met him, he warned you of your value, but did not claim it for himself. On days he was hunting alone, he would find you, sometimes leaving small offerings of meats or fruits for you and the three with you, never coming into your hiding spot but intimately familiar with the scents of you all and how to find where you’d moved to. He was checking on you, to ensure you hadn’t been caught yet, and were not starving while hiding. Eventually…. You invited him in while the other three were out, and asked him why, why he, a royal himself, right hand man to the Empress, would not simply kill you, capture your revolutionary of a son, take the powerful psion traveling with you, why he would not turn in the most wanted trolls on this planet, reap the reward and sit high and pretty, a life of luxury having delivered to the Empress what she most wants. His own lips curled, fins laying back flat as he spoke of his revulsion to violence against other trolls… He was a hunter, but of beasts, and the smell of troll blood made him sick, he hated it, loathed how powerhungry the Empress has become, hated that she would send a death warrant to trolls who were, yes, causing some riots, but were not hurting anyone by doing it. To kill the snake you get it right at the head, she insisted. The signless mutant was the head of the serpent that was causing trouble in her henhouse of followers, making them rowdy, unruly, less productive, causing unease. She wanted him dead, and her subjects submissive. He wanted her to just… leave it alone. Let people be people, they are more productive when happy than when scared, anyhow.

When Nideki returned to the cavern first, your vicious olive huntress, deadly and precise, and saw the flash of violet, she lunged, slashing at his face, right across his nose, eye, and fin, leaving a horrid gash and blinding him partially, and you reached for her, pulling her away as she spat and hissed and struggled with raw fury in your arms. While she threw threats and insults at him, he apologized, bleeding profusely and in pain, and backed away from you to give you space. The psion returns, hand linked with your boy behind him, who warily eyes the violet. None of the three of them trust him or want him here, but seeing you carefully restraining Nideki, who could easily eviscerate the unarmed man here and now and save you all the trouble of having him coming around…. They decide it best to not attack as well, though they do not trust you have made they right judgement call, you clearly have decided you do not want them to kill the Orphaner… So they sit, away from him, near you, unhappy but not fighting. He apologizes once more, for invading your home, apologizes to them… The psion spits at him, the huntress bristled up, claws splattered with his blood. The prophet, your boy, looks away, tucking his head against you, and asks the violet to leave, please. He has caused enough unrest.

He leaves. He will not turn you in… you do not like him, but you are feeling less wary around him. He makes a habit of continuing to leave offerings, though they are far more sparse now. For a while, they slow, then stop entirely, and you wonder what may have happened to him. Months go by, no word of the Orphaner, you 4 are still on the run. Growing… nearly a sweep now, you are stronger, but more tired now, Your boy has grown larger, stronger, tired as well. The psion is a bit shaggy, his abilities honing, the huntress more deadly and efficient. Your boys seem to be dating now, and while you feel romance may be a high risk clouding judgment, it makes them happy, brings a bit of peace to the stress and risk of the day to day life, so you let them have that, glad they are coping alright with the constant threat you all face together. News reaches you… Through rumor at a sermon, among the crowds, you overhear what has come of the Orphaner. He is alive, he had been supposedly mated to the Legislacerator ! A teal with a sharp sense of law, someone he, a violet, should not have been seeing in the eyes of the Empress. A cerulean had become involved, a trial, and one way or another, the Legislacerator had been the one killed. The Empress sent a clown, a massive hulking purple, to deal with the Orphaner, discipline him. Rumor was circulating he’d been killed by the clown… Your stomach does an uneasy flip, but that is one less threat to your group, isn’t it?

After what must be another few sweeps, you see a man at one of the sermons, hood up, hair long, wavy, graying, and a nasty gash across his face, an eye blinded, watching, listening attentively to what your boy says. He keeps back, keeps mostly hidden, but you recognize that face. A ghost, he must be… He vanishes into the crowd when he notices you peering at him, and you do not see him again the rest of the night. But a few weeks pass, and there is bread, fruit, meat, waiting for you. 

It becomes an infrequent habit, he resumes bringing you food, supplies, sometimes medical, often practical, clothing or fresh water, antibiotics, keeps you healthy, and finally… comes inside once more. While the other three are not happy to see him, you are admittedly relieved he is alive… You get to know his name, he yours, and you get to know Him a bit, as he slowly sort of joins in with the revolution your boy is heading. He does not travel with you, not wanting to make the group larger and put you all more at risk, but he checks on you all often, helps tend to injuries, covers your trail. He helps you all avoid capture, and you find yourself caring for him, the pain he has been through, the gentleness he offers, his genuine intent to help your cause. He confirms he lost his mate, explains what happened with the king of the clowns, he is tired, battered, but alive, rumor spreading to even the Empress herself that he had been killed as opposed to exiled. She did not grieve him, and that solidified his worth to her…

But that was history…. Right now, you find yourself in pain.. Pain no bandages could ever patch, no antiseptic could keep from rooting deep into your psyche. Your son, dead, the huntress seeking vengeance against the executioner…. She will get herself killed, you know she will… The psion… he escaped with the huntress, trying to keep her from doing anything reckless, but you know he would not use his powers against her, and you know she will slip away in the night to hunt, as she sees is right. Mateus causes distraction when they try to take you, he fights, kills another troll… he has to, to keep you safe. You get away, the crowd scattering when violence breaks out. You don’t know if he will survive, the guards are far too plentiful and he is tired, hurt. When you see him later, he looks haunted, but he is alive, carrying the body of your son in his arms so you may bury him… it’s only right, he shouldn’t be up there like a decoration…. The violet helps you dig, find a place no one would vandalize, and lay your boy to rest. Despite his help, you are angry, in pain, ravaged with anguish you lash out, biting, clawing him, cursing him, this is his fault, he made everything so complicated. 

He reaches, tired, sick, “Celena….” You shake your head, spitting, “DON’T YOU DARE, Do not speak my name, You could have prevented this!” 

He couldn’t have. You know that, he knows that… and he knows you don’t mean it, but it still hits hard, the blow making him wince, guilty, distressed, the stench of blood on him. Blood… His arms secure around you and you bite again. He lets you…. Hugging you tight, holding you close as you lash, hissing, mourning, wailing in anguish, he soothes you, patting gently, shooshing, letting your anger bubble over into loss as you break down and cry against him, becoming limp… Clinging to him for dear life. “I’ll find the others…. We will get them back… I won’t abandon ye, Celena… It isn’t over..”

A tiny sliver of you…. Believes that. Believes him, as you cling to him, feeling hopeless, angry. You believe him… he will help, he will find the other two, if they’ve been captured, he will fight til he dies to free them… if they are killed… he will bring them back to you, as he has your son… 

This will get him killed, when he is found, but it won’t be for a long time… One day, he will be caught, trying to free the psion from the helm he’d since been captured and locked into… The huntress long since killed and buried amidst her quest for vengeance, only the psion left to bring home, alive or otherwise… Mateus will be found, the Empress personally executing him herself, and capturing you, to live out the rest of your days a slave to the cerulean who had killed your diamond’s mate… It won’t be a long life, though. For now, while you still have time, while the other two are still alive…. You hold him tight, and you let yourself believe him… It’s the only thing you can do now..

**Author's Note:**

> Little Cheatsheet because I suck at Explaining who is who in the moment
> 
> Dolorosa - Celena  
> Signless - (not named in fic)  
> Psiionic - Thoule  
> Disciple - Nideki  
> HIC - (not named in fic)  
> Dualscar - Mateus  
> Mindfang - (mentioned but not named)  
> Redglare - (mentioned but not named, Dualscar's matesprit )  
> Darkleer - (mentioned but not named)  
> GHB - (mentioned but not named)


End file.
